Because Happiness Isn't Always Defined by Endorphins

What if you're a sadist or engage in BDSM? Will you ever actually admit it? Polite table manners say no. The few things not subjective in this world are definite emotions; hate; desire; confusion, etc. So what's my point, really? I've just finished reading Lolita. I liked it. It's similar to The Great Gatsby: it's trying to capture moments in time, of the past (lucky for me, I have several cameras, although I can't live those moments again). Ironically, these enduring characters that try to take the past into the present are going to last for many more lifetimes to come. Why? When they inevitably fail their quests we are struck with a heartbreaking longing.
Is it because we relate? That's partly so.
Maybe it's because these characters are striving for something that the human condition implies but never directly expresses: happiness.

Anybody can say that Humbert Humbert is a sick freak, for loving nymphets. But his happiness is no better than mine if my ultimate goal was to start my own business and become successful. Sure, I might have to stab a few backs to gain corporate deals and whatnot, but hey: it's nothing personal, it's business. Is my happiness more 'honourable' that his? No, I don't see it that way. Honour is just a label. I cause less hurt in my ultimate goal, therefore it is more probable that Humbert Humbert should burn in hell because his happiness violates nymphets. What was my point again?
...
Ah, yes. Happiness. Subjective. Elusive as fuck. Nothing more, nothing less. Very short-lived, but very much much worth it...whatever "it" is.

It's My Decision

We are 'thrown' into the world. It is not of our own choosing, Heidegger says; and I agree. It's the only thing that's ever been 'forced' unto us. Think about it: we have a choice in every single one of our actions. McDonald's or KFC? Coke or Pepsi? The underlying implication here is that choice has always been ours, in the ways we think, act and speak. You chose clothes to wear today, although it might have been for school or business attire that creates a facade of professionalism, and you chose what things you need to face another day.
So, now we move onto freedom of choice. It is like a double-edged sword; hey! look at me! I can do whatever the fuck I want! Haha; but I also know I shouldn't do this or that because someone will get hurt and because society says so. But just because society deems it so, does not make it universal. With all this freedom at our disposal, it's more like a burden, isn't it? Sartre viewed it this was because he was living under German-occupied France; choose one side, the other side or suicide; you have no right to say that the Germans or French nationalists made you do it - it was never their choice: freedom is a heavy weight.





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It's funny though, an idea like freedom isn't a burden until you start to realise it is not measured in pounds or kilos.

Never Cave In

Meanings cannot be directly interacted with, so argues Derrida. Signifiers always defer meaning or ideas, in the purest sense.
So what's the point of it all? Well, here I am trying to explain, as a middle-ground, the concept of 'différance'. But it is this middle-ground Derrida places différance. Can't we just make meanings as we go along in life or do we have to stick to the rigid constructs of society? Touché, Joker.
"They're only as good as the world allows them to be." The Dark Knight (2008)

In this blog I will try and represent different perspectives of concepts, because meanings have never been set in stone. In the end, these are just going to be my interpretations.




The idea of being an existentialist:
The scenario is a psychiatrist waiting for their patient. The psychiatrist is reading one of the books on the shelf, that was just meant to be for decoration. But whatta-you-know, it's actually useful in this case.
There's a knock at the door, the book is put down on the desk. The patient is here.

...

Patient: Look, I just think I don't fit in as well. That's why I have these problems. I'm small, insignificant. If I were to die tomorrow nobody would give a damn.
Psychiatrist: That's just being overly pessimistic. Focus on the good things you have. You have your health, you're not living in poverty and as much as you don't like your job, it's paying a lot more than the average wage earner.
Patient: Yeah, so what? What does it matter? I'm not important.
Psychiatrist: So you say. But being small doesn't equate to being insignificant. Life, as we know it, is fragile and ephemeral. But it doesn't make it any less meaningful, unimportant or insignificant.
Patient: ...I guess.
Psychiatrist: OK, let's try some mind-over-matter. As an exercise, I want you to repeat to yourself three times a day, for at least a minute "I am small, but significant and I will never cave in."

...

The patient gently closes the door and the psychiatrist breathes deeply a few times.
The book is picked up and placed back into its niche. Only two more patients to go, thinks the psychiatrist. It's been so long, the habit has been accustomed to the psychiatrist's breath, and it's repeated for over a minute, closer to two.
"I am small, but significant and I will never cave in."

Good Morning

It is 7:05AM in Sydney, Australia, and I am writing a blog post. This post is fine, it's the widgets I need to add that's the trouble i.e. RSS feeds, links, AdSense, Twitter, etc.


"If everything could ever feel this real forever.
If anything could ever be this good again..." Everlong - Foo Fighters